For many years I have been playing World of Warcraft. I have no idea how many times I have entered an instance as part of a group. Lets just say if I could count it would be a 4 digit number, at least.
Normals, Heroics, Raids, even Battlegrounds, all group activities that I enjoy.
All this time I had the impression that many tanks out in the wide wide world of Pugs were simply elitist asscandles.
I’ve seen tanks stand and watch people die. Even seen one that danced with the mob that was killing the group.
I’ve seen tanks viciously chew out the healer, or more often one of the Dps for something I didn’t see happening.
I’ve seen tanks drop group without a word, generally after pulling a new pack of mobs over to wipe the group.
I always thought that these folks were asshats who only queued up for a dungeon to make other peoples lives miserable.
I was wrong.

I have pugged my way from 15 to 51 on my little Pally tank now, and I have seen myself doing some of the same damn things. The reality is that the tank is there for pretty much the same reasons you are. Be it experience while leveling, or points and gear at the cap.
They don’t, well at least I don’t, zone in expecting to be an asshole. Some times I end up feeling like one though.
My personal pet peeve is Dps that decide they want to start pulling for me. It irritates me so damn much that two of my three party chat macros are written with it in mind. Here, I’ll run thru them.
Macro 1: Hiyas folks, I’m Desmona and I’ll be your conductor for this ride on the crazy train. Let me know when you’re ready and we’ll get this party started.
That one, obviously, is my way of saying hello while we grab quests and buff up. Sometimes chat ensues, sometimes not. Either way, I’m just saying hello and trying to get a chuckle perhaps.
Macro 2: Thanks for the assist <name>, but kindly let me handle the pulling.
This one gets used about once every other instance on average. If someone is intentionally pulling, It simply asks them to stop. 90% of the time thats all it takes.
Macro 3: <name> I asked you nicely to let me do my job. If you pull again, you’ll find yourself kicked, or the group in the market for a new tank.
This is the part where I turn into an asshat, at least in my book.
No, I have never pulled a bunch baddies over and left them to chew on my group. I have left, but never in the middle of a pull.
If I have a problem with heals it’s usually dealt with in whispers, asking if I am pulling too much, or moving to fast. Most of the time the healers are, if anything, wanting me to move faster to challenge their skills.
I can see now why there are so few tanks that are willing to Pug, and I see why many of the ones I have run with over the years have come across as pretentious jerks. They aren’t, no more than I am.
They just want to have a nice smooth run like everyone else.
Most people zone into an instance expecting the tank to be the leader of the group. Right or wrong, that’s the impression most people have.
If you are going to expect them to be a leader, then let them lead.
I know I am a lot more aware of that now when I play my other characters.